I have a few things to say…
First of all, My blog has been hacked, so that’s why there are super annoying ads at the top. What is it today? viagra? penis enlargers? Whatever.
I have been unable to upload the episode I have recorded because apparently the way the hacker got in was through the ftp. Meaning my ftp password now doesn’t work, and I can’t get in to upload any files or delete the bullshit they’ve added. It’s very frustrating, and IPowerweb is not helpful at all with their canned responses. At this point I can’t afford to buy a domain with another, more reliable service and start over, because ya know.. crap is expensive, and that money has already gone to this useless space.
Since I can’t upload the episode about New Year Resolutions, but somehow I can still post text.. I will talk about it here.
My resolution is strange.. as a quilt blogger and podcaster, I should be talking about quilting, right? Well, while others are making lists of UFOs and committing to making more quilts in the coming year, my resolution is to make fewer quilts this year. *crickets*
I know, right? Sounds dumb coming from me? But, it’s not just to make fewer quilts. because the second part of my resolution is to read more books. I have been trying to do some mental housekeeping lately and I know that I was a much happier person when I read more books. Maybe that is silly and there is no connection whatsoever? But maybe, just maybe, there is something I have been missing in my life and it’s high time to get back to it. I used to read a lot. As a child I read very early, even before starting kindergarten. I always had a book in my hand. As a teen I slowed down a lot to do other, teenagery things, but as a young married adult, with no cable tv, and sharing a vehicle with my husband, I had hours and hours to fill with wonderful books.
I was shocked to realise that in the last several years, I have only read a small handful of books. Why is that? Have I been so obsessed with winning quilting that every spare moment has been spent at the machine, cranking out quilt after quilt, neglecting other areas of my life, to the detriment of my spirit? Am I being really overly dramatic? Maybe. Probably. But there is something to it.
I don’t know why or how, but I am not feeling the drive, or the joy at the moment for sewing and quilting. Perhaps, I am just a little burned out and need a break. Maybe next week I will be ready to quilt again? Maybe next month, maybe next year. I just don’t know. All I know is that I am not happy right now, and quilting is leaving me mentally exhausted. I still have to sew and quilt for work. Maybe that’s why I feel burned out? Maybe it took a year for the shine to wear off, and for the fun stuff to start feeling like a chore? Quilting five meander quilts in a row just does absolutely nothing for the creative spirit. Maybe I’m just tired.. Maybe being sick over Christmas just wore me out physically, emotionally, and mentally? I don’t know.
I know that I will come back to quilting, I just have no clue when it will be. I have to listen to my own needs, and right now all I hear is, “relax, read.” I will not entertain self-imposed quilt guilt over not cranking out umpteen quilts this year. I refuse to beat myself up.
When I do get some quilting mojo back, you’ll be the first to know. I will still be on twitter, instagram, and goodreads sharing my life and friendship with those of you who have come to mean so much to me over the past three years. I am NOT podfading, but at this time, I don’t know when the site will be fixed in order to upload more episodes. That hacking nonsense really hasn’t helped my holiday blues/quilt depression. I can’t even upload any pictures!!!! GRRRRR!!!! I AM SO FECKIN MAD!
Anyhoo.. I am considering starting another blog on blogger or another free service just so I can be able to post pics again. That doesn’t fix the podcast problem, but at least it is something. I’m just so fed up with Ipowerweb, I could spit!
In the meantime, here are two books I’ve enjoyed and I hope you will join me in a reading challenge this year. I’ve set a goal of 55 books for 2015, because I know I can read at least a book a week plus a few. My sister posted on her blog, The Dusty Bookshelves,a list of criteria for a book challenge, and I am using it to guide me this year, to expand my horizons. I hope some of you will find it fun and challenging, and join me. However, I do want to say.. NO BOOK GUILT. Just like my new motto is “No Quilt Guilt” I don’t want the reading challenge to become yet another thing I use to show myself how I don’t measure up. You do not have to use the whole list if you choose not to. You definitely do not have to challenge yourself to read 55 books this year either. Most avid readers average about 20-30 books per year. Don’t ask me for sources on that, because I totally made it up based upon what I have heard, read, and seen, there was no research involved.
My point is, give yourself a break, in all areas of your life. No guilt trips. not about quantity, frequency.. or even quality! Who are _they_ so say your book choices are less important or valuable than anyone else’s?
So anyway.. now that I have been honest about how I have been feeling, I am feeling a little better.
This week I read The Woman in Black, by Susan Hill, and I highly recommend it. Although written in 1983, it has a specific Old London feel. I don’t remember the setting year ever being strictly stated, but there are “motor cars” and “pony and trap” transportation both being utilized. It’s an uncomplicated ghost story, with a real atmosphere immersion. I sank right into this book. It is not at all gory, or shocking, but it is very well written and genuinely unsettling.. but in a great way. It’s like Charles Dickens’ and H.P. Lovecraft got together, and this book is their lovechild. Check it out.
And now, I am halfway through Garden Spells. by Sarah Addison Allen. This book is delightful. It is the story of two sisters, a family really, who have been apart for the past decade. The older has taken over the family business in a sense, and the younger is coming home, escaping an extremely abusive relationship, with her five year old daughter in tow. This is no ordinary family, and everyone knows they have gifts. Now, stick with me, this will sound cheesy, but it is very well written… There is an apple tree in their back garden that seems to hold the root of their abilities. They have a distant, elderly cousin with the gift of anticipation. She gives gifts that people don’t know why or how they’ll need them until days later, and the house itself even seems to have a personality, flinging its windows open wide when all its occupants laugh in unison. This is a charming book. These aren’t spoilers either, you get all this in the first chapter or so. I’m loving this book and I hope you will too.
I will talk to you all soon, in the meantime, follow me on goodreads, and
Go read something